with apologies to William Blake
Tiger! Tiger! Burning bright
In the bedrooms of the night.
It’s not just golf that you enjoy--
You’ve been a VERY busy boy.
You have the look of boy next door
(At least, that’s what we took you for).
We never knew your second game
Was harvesting the “perks” of fame.
We never knew your private Alps
Consisted of amassing scalps.
Since not all women “kiss and tell,”
It’s clear that you did VERY well.
The celebrity collectors? Sure--
Temptations most male stars endure.
Many may resent restriction,
But don’t embrace a sex addiction.
And that’s your challenge, golfer friend,
As well as where endorsements end,
And marriage too, perhaps…don’t blame
Your wife for leaving you to shame.
Tiger! Tiger! Left behind
By a spouse no longer blind,
Your secret life has crashed and burned:
Has anything worthwhile been learned?
By Debby Cooper
Debby Cooper is originally from eastern Massachusetts, but has logged many more years living on the West Coast. She is a graduate of Mt. Holyoke College, where she did NOT major in English, but in history. She has been writing poetry for nearly as long as she can remember, and reports that her specialty (and what she most enjoys writing) is rhymed metric humor. When the Tiger Woods scandal erupted, she found herself unable to resist writing a parody of William Blake's Tyger poem. Her credits include many poetry publications as well as a variety of anthologies.