Presidential Panned-toum

I did not steal that there election!
Since becoming the presidential
(though by unorthodoxy selection),
I must keep proving my credentials.

Since becoming the presidential,
There are some thingies I should address.
I must keep proving my credentials;
This causes me extreme digress.

There are some thingies I should address.
People, just why are y’all all laughin’?
This causes me extreme digress—
These lies that bind are surely chaffin’.



People, just why are y’all all laughin’?
I’m not as smart as lovily Laura.
These lies that bind are surely chaffin’.
But in sincerialness, I are-a!

I’m not as smart as lovily Laura.
To deceit you, not my strategery.
But in sincerialness, I are-a.
I’ll win you with charm and flattilery.

To deceit you, not my strategery.
Though by unorthodoxy selection,
I’ll win you with charm and flattilery;
I did not steal that there election!

by Sharon Burris

Sharon Burris teaches Creative Writing, English Comp, and Native American and British literature for Murray State College in Oklahoma. She has won writing and journalism awards, and enjoys close-up photography and nature studies. An avid gardener, she also “mothers” various abandoned and shelter-adopted animals, but fervently (futilely?) denies being “the Cat Lady.”

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